Life As A Writer And A Researcher Can You Be Too Honest

You know how you plan out everything out, and you have this idea what will be. Then nothing is what you thought or even comes close to what you pictured. It seems like this week has been about that. I had planned out to write and what to write and excited about how I was going to put it down on paper but just seems after the changes how can I write about it now. I can talk about my school week in kicking some major Sex Class, Writing and whatever else I stuffed in my brilliant mind that I have learned in the past week, but that is annoying. I can talk about dates that I am researching and couples that I am speaking with, and that is not boring. I do however need to start thinking of what does come out of my mouth, now everyone that does know me in person has this in writing. Print it, Frame it because this is not a typical moment, and well Pigs just flew and Texas has rain.

Sometimes I do think that if I wait and just watch what unfolds that sometimes my writing will just land on my feet and most of the time it does. Then no worries about my mouth and the news of whatever that will become news to write about already had it coming out to say. They already did so much for me, so all I have to do is finish what they started. For some reason, I did not retain any of the juicy stuff and instead it was more in regards to privacy and what to say and not to say. This is such a problem with me at the moment because the one I never was born with a filter. Now, my daughter thinks that Sabrina Ford is my Alter Ego that needs to put on a leash and kept in a cage. Only let out when it is for feeding time aka writing time. It was about sending emails instead of taking the time to write a letter. The point was to convey why it is important to keep traditions going. That normal manors continue and be passed down to next generation and why those things are still important. So at this point I guess I am at a standstill on what to write, but I keep going back this privacy issue thing. I guess this issue is coming up because what is my limit now. How far will I go and what will I write. I feel I should have the right to say what I please, and that comes from the brain and out the shoot. Then again I think about my loved ones whom I do love or will come across my path what if I have to respect their wishes. What if they say NO I am not allowed to write about them?

They say that the Truth will set you Free and that being honest is the path to be. Then when you look around, I never see anyone being honest anymore, and this is going from across the board from top to bottom. Very simple to you telling your wife no she does not look fat in that outfit when you know she does. Alternatively, even saying to your partner that you enjoyed dinner when damn well the cat even gagged on it. Your employees do it, Oh yes I finished it, and it took me this amount of time while it is still sitting on your desk.  Everyone thinks of it as a white lie, and everyone looks down at dishonesty, but then everyone still does it in his or her way. When it just so much easier not argue, and not hurt someone’s feeling by being honest. I mean there is a list I am sure you can go down of what you tell yourself to make it ok in your head why it is okay to go down the little white lie path. Break it down further why was the little white lie even thought of in the first place. Most of the time it was to protect something or someone. Think about it, you were protecting her feelings, you were protecting your integrity or protecting an image. Alternatively, was it straight up fear, scared of being in trouble or say you were afraid of not being able to take that sale on and hit sale numbers at the office. 

So what is being Honest then, it is Trust! Flat out, hands down trust. So by being honest I am trustworthy a good human trait. Now by giving a white lie to the person that you are protecting deep down it shows that you do not trust that person. That by you lying to “protect them “is saying that they are not worthy of your honesty or your confidence. Intern, they get the white lie, that the protection mode so much easier. So really what kind of friendship will can you have at the end, and nothing can be to honest.  A one-way ticket down no man’s land of never coming back together because you started off on the wrong foot. So in the end you are asking yourself how highly you think of this person.  Blunt, yes I know but that is the truth, and that is me being honest. That is how it is broken down as humans in our heads. How we make it out to be okay for that white lie to come out. Oh Hell, that is how we lie to ourselves too. White lies all the time about ourselves in our heads. You know what I am saying too and think about if you cannot trust others and you are lying to yourself as well. What do you think to yourself and how healthy you are mental?

So can I be honest is the question now? I mean it is in the title, but I feel the real issue that everyone would like to know, Do I have what it takes to get the honest out and be honest to my writing. So after all of this I find that yes that I am and No I will never break my word on trust. I want you to trust me and believe in me, and if you ask me not to write about you, then I will not and that my word is my bond. That if I tell you something that I mean what I say, that I do have respect for your wishes. I feel that I have more respect for myself and would not cause disgrace to myself just for some words. Just to make some words come across the internet just for what because, I have the know how to do so, that is called being a bully. Just not worth it to me in the end. Rather have my respect for myself, from you, the respect of my readers. Now I am not saying you give out entirely everything on yourself, and pass out Tax info and how much you make.  Nor do I think you need to explain why you are not speaking about an individual subject because you have the right to not talk about it, and that is your right. Also remember is that by being honest with loved ones is how the outcome is coming out any different in the end. You are supposed to be frank and open to them, so the outcome should still be the same in the end right. Right!

Sabrina Ford